I piss a lot. Sometimes, I poop.
If you're not into awkward, fat, sometimes funny, blue haired, oversharing stoners who don't shave or wear a bra, keep scrolling
Butt, if that's your bag, I'll see you right back here regularly, for daily Watersports clips (up to $5), Occasional toilet shitting ($10), and full length feeder/hydration clips ($7)
Twitter: @HerEllaness | Instagram: HerEllaness | Manyvids: Her-Ellaness
Did I miss a spot? I feel like after 41 years on this earth, I should know how to wipe by now, but my jaw dropped when I saw droplets on my bum when I stood up!
I knew I was having a hard time getting the piss to land in the water so it would make audible sounds, but I didn't realize I'd shifted so much I peed on my own ass.
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Starting off with a song, I'm going to serenade you because singing narration is part of my everyday life. These denim shorts are too big for me now so I can slide them down my hips without even undoing them.
I chose not to wear panties underneath them because sometimes you just need to let your vajeen breathe.. And when a wind blows up my shorts.. well..
Right, I'm talking about a piss clip, not my hairy bush on the breeze. You can see my body visibly relaxing as my flip flops slowly lower to the floor and as I finish my 40+ long sending piss, my thick thighs begin to tremble and I let out the tiniest toilet fart you've ever heard..
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$4.99
I'm feeling maternal, which is unusual for me, I also hate nicknames, so calling you Precious was out of my comfort zone. Not enough that I won't post this piss clip, I'm a money whore and understand the value of a one of a kind clip. If you ever want to hear me, say it you're going to have to buy this pee clip, because it's the first, last, & only time I'll be saying it.
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As I slid my leggings off my ass and down, I could feel my panties sag, and it made me feel self-conscious, and I hesitated to post it for a second.
Then I realized, self-conscious about what? The chance to go shopping for new panties because I lost weight?
Besides, I squirm with desperation & piss for more than.. I don't know, I stopped counting after 30 seconds. And all of that makes for a fantastic piss clip.
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$3.99
Full body shivers take over me as I unzip my sweater and slide it down my arms. I hang the sweater on the towel rack to keep it off the floor and suddenly I find myself pressed against the wall, holding on with everything I have in me.
I need to pee. I can make it to the toilet. Today will not be the day I piss myself.
The feeling passes and as I begin peeing I'm lost, transported into another world where nothing and no one matters, just how I'm feeling, just what I'm hearing, just the shivers running though my body.
It was almost perfect until..
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It's a slow quiet day of recovery after the recent rain. In my comfiest pj's pants I sit on the toilet. As I begin peeing my hand begins to tremor..
I personally find it pleasing to the eye, but I haven't always had that shake in my hand. It's actually a visible sign of my disability.
The back and forth of it doesn't hurt in the moment, but it does get a little warm after it stops.
My profile does clearly state that I'm disabled, but because it's such an invisible illness, I often forget to talk about it's visible symptoms.
If that was too deep for a paywall post.. erm..
Rewatch the clip and pretend I said something hilarious and sexy and let me know if I peed for longer than 30 seconds or not..
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Desperation is the word of the day as I bend over the counter, panting, squirming, & clenching as hard as I can. I'm so close to relief. It's 2 steps away. I just need to..
Aren't my plaid leggings adorable with the yellow shirt? There isn't a whole lot of yellow in the leggings, so I feel like it matches, but the shirt gets a starring role in my outfit.
Right! Potty time! I slide my leggings & panties down my thick thighs and finally sit down on the toilet to relieve myself.. 30 seconds of pure, unadulterated joy.. And just when I think the bathroom trip couldn't get any better...
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$9.99
I am a blue wave with my curly hair, my tye dye shirt and my blue-green pants on.. I wiggle like one too when I toss my hair back and forth💙
I sit down on the toilet and begin to pee. I look behind me to find that my new tattoo isn't in frame! So I adjust my booty to show it off as I'm pissing.
Now that I've seen it.. My self-obsession begins to grow.. I gently place my hand on it, caressing it lightly. It's no longer itchy, but because it's still healing it has a different texture which is soothing to play with.
Slowly, in circles, I rub and caress my ass.. giddy in the knowledge that the first of my sleeve has begun🥰 I pause because I'm lost thought about what my next tattoo is going to be..
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That's the question I ask you after wiping away a soft wet shit that slid out of my ass effortlessly. I have wet wipes now, but I forgot them on the kitchen counter when I ran upstairs to use the bathroom.
To be fair the reason the shit came out so readily is because I was holding it in for a bit. I was putting the groceries in the trunk of the car when I felt the need to poop, I didn't want to go back into the grocery store *just* to take a dump so I clenched my cheeks and waited.
Once I was done bringing the groceries inside the house I ran to the bathroom to poo without unpacking the wet wipes. I feel like somehow.. looking back on how long I was wiping.. Next time.. I'll clench a little longer & grab the wipes.
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I'm in love with my curls & I have a song stuck in my head that I can't sing on camera so I'm tapping my thighs to the beat instead.
Good on you for getting the camera past me in such an obvious place. I was distracted.
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When I'm feeling sexy it makes for a fantastic piss clip. When I curl my hair, I feel sexy. The blue waves, bouncing as I swing my hair back & forth, the way it hugs my face, the way it bounces to the full body shivers I get as the pee comes to it's conclusion.
How to I just keep getting sexier with age?
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This is exactly why I usually film overnight. I'm sure he's not doing it on purpose, but the man has a knack for coughing, sneezing or laughing in the background when I try to film during the day.
As soon as I heard him, I forgot what to say next, but the piss was too good not to post. Anyway.. tip to buy me a weekend house. One where I can film undisturbed.
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Sliding off my sweater and gently placing it on the floor so as not to break the bauble, I have replaced the zipper with. I walk over to the toilet for a very boob-centric piss.
I pull my leggings down, and you get a flash of braless cleavage as I do so, then again, as I pull down my light pink panties. I tug at my pink shirt to give you more boobs as I lean forward so you see down my shirt for the 40+ second long pee.
Wiping away what remnants there are with toilet paper, I toss the toilet paper in the toilet bowl and go to slide my panties up... wait.. was that.. tissue.. falling out of my panties? Is that how I get Klingons? Erm.. cling-ons?
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Before I filmed this piss clip I changed into the cutest mismatch pink socks you've ever seen. The light pink matches the pink on my panties so I had to shamelessly tug at them as I slid them down my legs to make sure you noticed.
The dark pink shirt matches the darker pink on the socks so I'm a hot pink mess today and I kinda love that for me.
And because a wardrobe change before peeing wasn't enough denial for me.. I changed the garbage before finally pissing for I think.. 40 seconds? Let me know if it was longer, I tend to stop counting after 20 seconds.
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$4.99
Okay so this is my second piss clip with my new tattoo. Being the money motivated whore I am, now that I've gotten tips on one site, a new subscriber on another, and cashed out on a third, it's safe to say I'm motivated 🤣
Also I'm fucking cute in this clip because looked at how excited I am to show you my tattoo! Sticking out my tongue, the little butt wiggle, you even get a peek at my stream of piss as I readjust on the toilet seat to make sure you can see my tattoo as I'm peeing.
I stopped counting after 30 seconds, could you be a love & tell me how long I pissed for? Thanks
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I've been super excited to show off my new tattoo, but with the 2nd skin on, there wasn't much to see, so I had to wait before I could show it off.
But it's time now! The adhesive is cleaned off and it's time to add some lotion to it!
But first it's time to empty the tank.. I'm yawning because as a housewife I take an N to the A to the P anytime I want and today called for one so I could make a spectacular piss clip when I got up.
I mean.. listen to that sound, watch that ass adjust, look at my new tattoo as I pee for over 40 seconds! A nice, long close-up of the tattoo because I turn the act of peeing into watersports.. like.. marathon pissing.
I wipe, flush, and wash my hands, then you get to watch as I lift up my skirt and add lotion to my ass to moisturize my shiny new tattoo. Can you tell I'm excited about my new tattoo? Maybe just a little?
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$5.99
I need to pee so badly that I am gripping the counter and rocking back and forth, breathing heavily as I sway, waiting for a break in the urgency so I can move to the toilet.
I get a break from the desperation that comes with having a long piss waiting in my bladder to be released.
I rush over to the toilet, pull my pants down, and sit as quickly as I can to relieve myself, and the pee starts peeing. Ten seconds, twenty seconds, I lean on the counter for support, for laziness, for waiting for over a minute while pissing. I really do know how to turn pee into watersports, huh? haha!
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It's hard not to feel like a princess when I'm in a brand new tye dye shirt, with brand new hair & a towel to dry my hands with on a beautiful spring day.
I get in the bathroom jogging in place because I need to pee so badly, but of course, self-obsessed me, the moment the feeling of urgency passes, I begin admiring myself in the mirror.
Right, I need to pee. But I know you're there, watching me. And I feel sexy. So before I sit down, I give you a show. Slowly, I bend over, pulling my pants down my thick thighs, revealing my black panties beneath them.
My soft belly looks delicious when I stand back up doesn't it? I want to bury my own face in my own large, soft belly.
Sliding my panties down, I sway my hips to give you a quick show before I settle down on the toilet seat and give you cleavage & clear audio for a 50+ second long piss. You're welcome.
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$4.99
Between the new hair dye & the new tye dye, I'm feeling pretty fucking gorgeous.. The shirt was a gift and it's all of the perfect colours. I love it when people just get me.
I tried out a new hair dresser too for the first time, which was nerve-wracking, but exciting nonetheless. The hairdresser did a fantastic job, I love the way my hair turned out. The blue is perfect & my hair is so silky, I can't stop running my hands through it.
I have to for now though because I just finished my coffee and now I need to poop.
I get to the toilet and look at that ass! It looks fantastic in those joggers! I slide them down and fucking hell, my ass looks good in LA Senza.. I need to go get more.
I sit my cute ass on the toilet and piss for about 20 seconds, then take a long, soft, mousse like shit that takes forever to clean up. I miss wet wipes. Tip me to remind me to buy more.
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$9.99
In my comfiest pj's, I rush to the bathroom because the urgency has taken over me. Of course, when I get to the bathroom, the garbage is once again overflowing. Like the good little housewife, I do some housework before allowing myself to finally pee.
As I begin replacing the garbage my hands seem to have a mind of their own because my brain can't seem to comprehend what they are doing as they seperate the new bag and get it put in the garbage can.
Once the task is complete, I can't stand up. My body is locked in place as the shivers takeover. All I feel is tingling, urgency, and helplessness. As I finally regain my faculties, I pull my pants down and sit as quick as I can to pee for what seems like forever.. But it is probably closer to like.. 40-45 seconds, I think.
As I finish peeing, I change the toilet paper roll, wash up, and take out the garbage. I'll see you tomorrow.. with a clean garbage can.
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$4.99